Last resort

Everyone on my friends list who will be reading this knows me well enough to know that I am a stubborn person. I will often exceed my physical, emotional, and mental limitations in order to please or help those that I care about.

I have been doing this for my family in all of those areas for the last 6 months now.

I am tired. I am tired of being in pain.

Even though I don't give up, I feel as though I have run out of options. I cannot handle everything on my own anymore. Not that I can't emotionally or mentally - I would push myself over the edge on those two... and who knows, maybe I already have. I cannot physically handle everything that I do any longer. Duane has known this and admitted it for a lot longer than I have and he has been doing everything in his power to come home to me and our daughters. This weekend, we finally decided together that as a last resort he was going to push for a hardship discharge.

This will allow him to re-enlist should he choose to in the future (although he insists he will never leave us again), but terminate his contract with the US Army allowing him to come home. He has other plans in mind. For now, the first being that he will take care of his family. We really need him to.

Of course, I have to write a letter explaining the situation, my family has to write a letter, and my doctor has to write a letter and I have to send them to his unit. I have mine done, my grandmother wrote one for her and my grandfather, and I just got off the phone with my doctors office and hopefully they will get it done soon. The sooner I can fax the paperwork, the faster they will (maybe) do something.

Since I cannot talk to my husband, as they took his cell phone, I will just have to hope that everything is in order until he calls me. I will do what I have to.

Everyone cross your fingers please that he will be home with us safely and soon.