What the fuck are THOSE!?

So at work this morning I made one of my usual twice hourly trips to the restroom. Today I was wearing a pair of my full panel maternity jeans (SEX-AY!) and a brown fitted cami under a sheer brown top. The routine goes something like this - flip up cami; flip down panel; pull down pants; proceed.

What I didn't anticipate however was after I pulled up my pants, and turned to the sink before flipping up panel and flipping down cami, I caught my reflection in the mirror and saw THIS:

Pardon the seductive maternity underpants, and the language, but what the fuck is that all about!? I am only 6 months pregnant and THOSE weren't there 3 days ago. I made it through Aidynn's entire pregnancy without a single (new) stretch mark. It looks as though I were attacked by something with skin thinning claws. They continue all the way around my waist. I've spared myself the humiliation of posting more pictures for evidence.

I was near panic when I discovered them. They were and are there. There was and is nothing that I can do about it. More could appear. I am helpless to avert them. I feel..... violated. Not that I have a bikini body, but still... it's my body. I liked it that way it WAS!

I should have seen it coming. In just 3 short weeks my belly went from bump to boulder, itched like crazy, and I was so damn hungry I thought I had twins and a tapeworm.

Of course I whined to Duane. Even though he laughed at me, he was sympathetic.

Pregnancy changes your body. You never know what it will do.... but none of it is good. I'm not sharing the toll that Aidynn took on my body. So far this baby has granted me my very own stripes.... I hope that is the worst of it.

PS: On a side note.... last night was the first night I slept on my new mattress. I had worried that I padi too much for a mattress I had never tested and it would be uncomfortable....

I would have paid so much more for this mattress.