"Why did you do that???"
I think my 2 year old might be feral. It happened sometime around her last birthday. She somehow un-domesticated herself... or at least half of herself. Despite the number of times I tell her to not run on the couch, decorate everything with crayons/markers/paint/milk/food/etc..., or jump on top of her 1 year old sister with her knees, she simply stares at me communicating via eye signals, "I do not speak your language strange woman." I almost buy it too, until she wants something, because "Can I have some fruit snacks Mommy?" rings out of her mouth clear as a bell. As soon as the needs are fulfilled, consider the pleasantries over.
So last night, the children finished their bedtime routines and pleaded with me to stay up and watch the rest of Yo Gabba Gabba. Sucker that I am (they put on the doe eyed "Pweeeeaaaase Mommy, Pweeeaaaaase??" routine) I agreed to it.
Unknown to me was the fact that little Miss Feral was concealing a weapon she smuggled from the dinner table. As I was checking my email, all was quiet but for the sound of DJ Lance Rock...
but as all mothers know: Toddlers + Silence or Crashing Sounds = Imminent Disaster.
Seemingly as soon as the panic set in the screams began, I turned to see my convict in training brandishing her weapon in one hand and a pink butterfly blanket in the other while her little sister screamed and held her palm to the side of her temple.
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you exhibit ABC:
I can only presume that big sister didn't have enough cigarettes to trade to little sister for the blanket in question so shanking her in the head was the only available option to get what she wanted.
Obviously.
Add that to the long list of things I never thought I would need to say to another human being.
Feral or not.
(Little sister is ok by the way. She has a small puncture wound on her forehead, and another sign of abrasion from the fork on her leg, but nothing permanent. )
I think my 2 year old might be feral. It happened sometime around her last birthday. She somehow un-domesticated herself... or at least half of herself. Despite the number of times I tell her to not run on the couch, decorate everything with crayons/markers/paint/milk/food/etc..., or jump on top of her 1 year old sister with her knees, she simply stares at me communicating via eye signals, "I do not speak your language strange woman." I almost buy it too, until she wants something, because "Can I have some fruit snacks Mommy?" rings out of her mouth clear as a bell. As soon as the needs are fulfilled, consider the pleasantries over.
So last night, the children finished their bedtime routines and pleaded with me to stay up and watch the rest of Yo Gabba Gabba. Sucker that I am (they put on the doe eyed "Pweeeeaaaase Mommy, Pweeeaaaaase??" routine) I agreed to it.
Unknown to me was the fact that little Miss Feral was concealing a weapon she smuggled from the dinner table. As I was checking my email, all was quiet but for the sound of DJ Lance Rock...
but as all mothers know: Toddlers + Silence or Crashing Sounds = Imminent Disaster.
Seemingly as soon as the panic set in the screams began, I turned to see my convict in training brandishing her weapon in one hand and a pink butterfly blanket in the other while her little sister screamed and held her palm to the side of her temple.
Ladies and Gentlemen I give you exhibit ABC:
I can only presume that big sister didn't have enough cigarettes to trade to little sister for the blanket in question so shanking her in the head was the only available option to get what she wanted.
Obviously.
"You do NOT stab your sister in the head! It is NOT ok to stab anyone in the head. PERIOD."
Add that to the long list of things I never thought I would need to say to another human being.
Feral or not.
(Little sister is ok by the way. She has a small puncture wound on her forehead, and another sign of abrasion from the fork on her leg, but nothing permanent. )
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9 comments: on "Prison Yard Rules"
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Nicely done. :) I subscribed to your blog but wish I knew how to put all my subscriptions in ONE PLACE! GAH! I'll figure it out. Anyway, I'm happy to be able to read and comment again, my friend.
Yay, you have a blog!!! Oh, I love it. The joys of raising two girls. Haha I feel your pain.
Awesome job and I love the design of the blog!
Hugs :)
Thanks all! And thanks Kim, I made the banner myself with a lot of frustration in tow in still learning photoshop LOL so I am quite proud of it.
Nice to see you blogging again, though I'll have to relate to the kid thing via my cats, who are like having toddlers....who never grow up. At least yours will someday, lol.
Steven
Love it!!! Glad you are back at it!
That's fantastic! The banner is my fav part too :) I'm SOOOO jealous that you have Photoshop as I want it. lol
is it a comment on my own lack of domestication that i adore our little Wild Thing?
Seriously... stabbing her sister in the head = bad... but come on... you have to give her credit for problem solving. She takes the most direct path to whatever it is she wants.
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